Wednesday, January 19, 2011

The Return of the Fatted Pig

I have returned.

I know a lot of you thought I'd died. Not true. Hell, I thought I was dead, too. Turns out I was just in Reseda.

But I'm back now, and ready to talk, type, and state things as I see fit, the Scott Said So way. I have refueled the furnace of my ego and have a surplus of hot air waiting to spew across your computer monitors. After all I've been through these past six months, I am ready to perry, thrust, and eviserate a variety of American icons, topics, and sacred cows. Yup. It's been a rough year. I would fill you in, but my esteemed legal counsel, Mr. Jacob Stein, has advised me against espousing details. I can only tell you that the many outlandish rumors of my alleged "incarceration" abroad were blown wildly out of proportion, and there is not one shred of evidence linking me to any of the sordid events involving any of those interns. Speculations and hearsay I tell you! Matter of fact, I refuse to speak further on the subject. I will simply add that I have nothing further to add.

And now...to the business at hand.

Well here it is a brand new year, ripe with possibilities and prospects. The rotting, bloated carcass of 2010 shrinking in our rear-view mirrors as we motor head-long into what will surely be a grab-bag of WTFs and You'veGottaBeKiddings. And I think I'm awake and sober enough now to be able to report and comment on anything that comes our way, people. I have a slew of topics I'm itching to tear into, and can't wait to get back up on that spot-lit soap-box where a blow-hard such as myself likes to think he belongs.

So, if you've an open mind and an ax to grind, or if you love spoon-fed opinions that are spicy and bite-sized, then all I can say is get comfortable, strap yourselves in, and open wide! Scott Said So is back, and I plan on being heard.

Want me to go off on something in particular? Tired of me already? One of the many hoping I'd remain dead? Email me. I'll be here, sharpening my rapier-like wit and shoveling coal into my ego.

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